She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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