I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize