There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
it's like iHOP with fire
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize