The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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