Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
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MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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