So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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