so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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