I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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