last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
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He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
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The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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