there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
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