Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize