DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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