Say something about gay babies.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
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Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
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