Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
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