We should be called the Road Head Warriors
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize