Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize