if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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