I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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