there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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