I seem to have left my pride at pride
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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