He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize