Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm way too hungover for life right now
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
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