All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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