I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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