How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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