vagina is talking i cant
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
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He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
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I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
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Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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