like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
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It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
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My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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