i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
