there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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