First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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