Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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