I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Sext me about skeletons
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
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