Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
You were trust falling into bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize