im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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