remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
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Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
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I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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