also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
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Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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