who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
And then he peed in my hair
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