I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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