Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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