dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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