Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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