Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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