He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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