I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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