i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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