He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
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I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
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You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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