Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
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He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
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Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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