Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Can't talk, ducks in the car
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize