If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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