You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
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